DarkWolf (2003)

I always seem to miss straight to DVD movies. Dark Wolf stars Kane Hodder as a biker guy who transforms into a werewolf on the prowl for his mate and will wreck anything in his way. Cameo by Tippi Hedren (The Birds, Marnie) who knows all about werewolves, but that doesn’t seem to aid in her survival for long. A detective takes the hot babe/female werewolf into hiding to protect her, but her scent lingers on anyone she’s touched and she and her friends are in BIG trouble. There is a really odd, lengthy and unnecessary nude photography session with 2 chicks in body paint. Kane shows up nude at the door looking for his woman (afterall, werewolves shred their clothes when they transform). I found the CGI transformations to be cheesy, but then after spectacular effects like in American Werewolf in London, I suppose I’m spoiled.

Rating: 1.5 out of 5.

Children of the Corn (2009)

Children of the Corn is a remake that is supposedly faithful to the book. Having never read the book, I was happy with the 1984 version. Instead of that guy from Wings and whatsherface from Terminator we have a black girl and a redneck just back from Nam driving across the country. She’s kind of a bitch and nags too much. They end up in the town where there are no adults because the creepy kids have murdered them all. They obey their leader, a Bible spouting kid named Isaac. We still get our ginger minion Malachai who is still pretty dark and evil but no Courtney Gains. There is no happy ending in this version. Only thing I liked about this version was that Isaac was actually played by a kid, which made him that much creepier. Other than that, pass.

Rating: 1 out of 5.